“Get up Minnie. We are going to the mall. We need to get our costumes.”
“What? Are you crazy? What time is it anyway?”
“5am. We have to get going. Snow is coming.”
“Get out of town, Wolf. Come back in 4 or 5 hours. I am tired. And we never get snow in October.”
“I am serious, you goof. Snow is on the way. Get up.”
“Go away. See you at 10 or 11. I am not in any mood to argue. See you later.”
At 8am, Wolf was back. “Hey girlie, it is snowing. We better get going or we will be stuck in the storm.”
“8am? I told you: 10 or 11. Now beat it.”
At 11am, Minnie woke up, got dressed and looked for Wolf. She found her in the dining room, nursing her 12th cup of coffee.
“So, are you ready, Wolf? Let’s go.”
“Look outside you idiot. And then ask me if we are ready to go.”
“Holy @%#%@%#%! It’s snowing!”
“No kidding. And there are at least 4 inches on the ground and 8 more to come. Forget it Minnie. Forget Halloween. Forget our costumes. Forget the fact that you are a complete moron. I am not happy.”
“Well, so what? We can improvise. What did you want to be anyway? Elvira? Right?”
“It doesn’t matter. I am not in the mood to discuss this fiasco.”
“Aw, come on, Wolf. I thought you had everything you needed to be Elvira. What are you missing anyway?”
“Boobs. That’s all. Just boobs.”
“You need more boobs? Holy Toledo, Wolf, you have boobs. I mean those boobs of yours are out of control. Your boobs surpass anything Elvira ever had.”
“You goof. I need fake boobs. Boobs that will knock your socks off. Boobs that are, well, that are not really boobs, but will look like boobs. Besides, mine are not for display, unless you are Sean Connery.”
“I have an idea. Remember those shoulder pads that we used to put in our sweaters? They kinda look like boobs. Come on. I have 2 in my drawer. Put on your outfit and let’s see how they look.”
The girls were giggling as they tried to tame those shoulder pads into boobs. They finally got the knack of it, and folded them into 2 gigantic balloons. And pinned them into the costume.
Wolf paraded down the hall, with her fake bosom. George and Frank sauntered by. Nothing. Not a comment. Not a nod.
“Hey boys, what’s up?”
“Huh? Oh nothing. By the way, you forgot to constrain those monsters again. And if I were you, I would see a doctor. Since when does an old bag like you grow 2 more? Maybe you can get those 2 hanging to your knees amputated.”