“It is so sad, Minnie, to think of those who will have no coats to wear this winter.”


“So our facility is collecting gently used coats to donate to those who need them.”


“Yeah. Beaver brought in a black and white hounds tooth coat, never worn.  The price tag was still on the coat.”

“How thoughtful!”

“Yeah, until it was stolen out of the donation bin.”

“What the hell?  What low down. deranged critter would steal a coat that was donated?”


“Oh for crazy!”

“Yup. Erica is a coat stealer. She even had the nerve to wear that coat when she took a break and went to starbucks.”

“Didn’t she know that Beav would recognize that coat when she saw Erica parading around in it?  I mean, didn’t the Beav say anything?”

“The Beav was reading, and didn’t notice, so naturally, I had to say something.  So I said, “Hey Erica! New coat? Sure is strange, but I thought I saw that coat in the donation bin.  By the way, you still have the tag on that coat. And the belt is tied up in the back, and it looks like you have a tail.  It sure is a nice coat. Did you steal it? I mean, did you just get that coat?”


“She became indignant and told me she bought the coat from the Beaver, for $5.  And she was going to donate her old coat to the cause, along with 2 black sweaters, that she was donating to Beav.”

“What the….?”

“You should have seen her, Minnie, prancing around in a stolen coat, on her way to starbucks.  I couldn’t help it, but my mouth opened, and out came the words:  “Coat Stealer!”

“What the ….?”

“Everyone in the back room came alive, and gathered around Erica, forming a circle, ready to stone her to death, chanting, “Coat Stealer… Coat Stealer…. Coat Stealer.”

“What the ….?”

“And Erica swished and swayed, displaying her new coat. I had to admit. It looked damn good on her, as she grabbed her car keys and rode off into the sunset, on her way to the coffee joint.  But as they say, karma is a bitch.  The coffee gave her indigestion and she spent the rest of the day, chomping on tums, hugging her stolen coat.   At that point, Beav put on one of Erica’s black sweaters and noticed a hole in it.  But that was nothing unusual.  All of Beaver’s sweaters have holes in them.  So, now we are considering a new mission: Collecting sweaters for the needy”

“What the …”

“And you know what?  I am predicting that if anyone donates a black sweater, the Beav will be wearing it, immediately after it hits the donation bin.  I can’t wait!  Sweater stealer!!!”






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