Weather forecast: A chance of snow, one to two inches. Hazardous travel for your evening commute. Winter weather advisory. Slick roads possible. Schools will be closing at noon. Be afraid, be very afraid. Snow will develop over the area by 1pm and continue until 10pm. When you wake up tomorrow, you will be faced with below freezing temperatures and icy roads. And if you think this is bad, wait til the weekend. NorEaster on its way. Heavy wet snow. And lots of it. By the way, I hope you are having a great day, friends.
And then there is Nancy Grace, who storms, fumes, and blasts her nightly guests and panel, whenever they disagree with her. (or are boring). And in her final salutation, whispers, in her little girl voice: “Good night Friend.”
Unknown caller: on your cell phone. You think, what the hell, I will pick up and see who it is. Telemarking: I thought there was a law against this stuff. Need car insurance, friend? No. Are you incontinent, friend? None of your beeswax. Congratulations, friend. You won the sweepstakes that you entered. I didn’t enter any sweepstakes. Hello, this is a courtesy call from your electric company. Did you forget to pay your bill? We all have an occasional lapse in memory. We have a forgiveness policy. Just pay your bill in 2 days, or we will cut off your power. Yes, in the middle of winter. Give us a call today, and remember, we are here to serve you. We value you as a customer and friend. xoxooxoxoxox
Keep smiling, keep shining
Knowing you can always count on me, for sure
That’s what friends are for
For good times and bad times
I’ll be on your side forever more
That’s what friends are for.
Good night, friend.