Hello Presidents.

It’s your day.

You sure picked a humdinger of a day to celebrate yourselves.

Abe?  Was it this cold in your cabin in Illinois?

No wonder you got the heck out.

George?  Did you really cross the Delaware in a boat?

Was there really someone on the other side, holding a lantern?

Were you wearing your wig?

In your honor, I wore my leggings, a pair of socks, 2 sweaters, a scarf, a bear coat and hat, gloves and dead man’s boots.

My brother in law works at a retirement home and gave me the boots, when one of the old gents expired.

I clunked around in them this morning, but I must take a time out to thank the dead old guy.

Those boots are an atrocity, but quite warm.

Some people donate their organs.

The dead guy donated his boots to a freezing cougar.

In your honor, George, I bought a battery operated lantern at Rite Aid.

It was one of those special products.

“As shown on TV.”

And for you, Abe, I almost bought a Lincoln.

But I settled for a Ford.

And tripped.

I called the Betty Ford Foundation.

“Will you commit a hopeless cougar wearing a polar bear hat and dead man’s boots?”

They told me to just say no.

I am not a crook.

I did not have sex with that woman.

The buck stops here.

I do not have Obama care.

And yes, I am a weapon of mass destruction.

There she goes again.  (dancing neath the starry skies)

I gave up and called the Donald.

He was in Camelot, with Miss Universe.

Hey Abe and George:  What the hell happened to our country?

They said, “Ask not what you can do for a cougar, ask what a cougar can do for you.”

Yes!  Hey Congress:  Let’s make a new national holiday!  Next year, let’s skip a February President’s day holiday and celebrate in April, when we don’t have to wear dead man’s boots and polar bear hats.

National Cougar day!    April 20th.

It is 420 somewhere.

 

Wolf

 

 

 

 

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