Hello my friends, enemies and those who don’t give a rat’s ass.
May I intrude on your thoughts this evening?
Just to share with you the highlights of my day?
I got an email from George Clooney.
Really, I did.
He wanted me to donate a dollar to Hillary’s campaign.
And if I did, I would have a chance to fly to his home in LA, and have dinner.
I called him and said: “Is Amal gonna be there?”
“Yes she is.”
Needless to say, I declined.
I highly doubt if Amal can stand the competition if I showed up, and I refuse to be the reason for another Hollywood breakup.
I got a call from Jim.
“Can you bring me home a salad?”
Yes!!!!! I don’ t have to fix that awful left over liver tonight.
I called my favorite Italian restaurant and ordered a grilled chicken salad.
The owner answered.
How did he know it was me?
I told him I need a salad and I would be there at 5pm.
He said, “I doubt it. It is now 3 minutes til 5pm.”
Ok, so I meant I was leaving at 5pm, but I couldn’t.
A customer called and needed help.
It wasn’t my customer, but if you know me, I put on my papal hat to pretend I could save the world.
Ok, so not the world, but I just can’t helping those who have no other recourse than to reach out to the chicken butt.
20 minutes later, I am on my way to pick up the salad.
The owner has the salad ready.
He says, “Hey what happened? I thought you said you would be here at 5, but we knew it was impossible, since you called at 458pm.”
So I drove to my watering hole.
“Hey, we were worried about you”, said the regulars.
“You are late.”
Am I in a rut? Predictable?
I had a few of my usual “orange drinks”, just like Truman Capote used to have.
Excuse me, but I have no idea why I mentioned that.
3 strangers walked in and acted like they knew me.
“My my, hey hey! Nice to see you again!”
Who in the hell are these people?
One of them said, “I am sorry if I offended you the other night.”
Shoot. I wish he would have elaborated on that.
Now, I am home.
Jim ate his salad.
The cats are fed.
I feel like this was a Monday to be remembered.
Just like every other day is a day to be remembered.
I love living in the moment.
Hope you and I will be here tomorrow, to enjoy another day on this planet,
Not sure why we are here, or what we are all about, but I do enjoy every one I meet, and can’t wait to see you again.