Hey! remember: I love you

What is love?

A feeling?

A desire?

A childhood friendship?

A family relationship?

A connection with another?

Or perhaps, just a chance encounter with someone who inspires us to be our best.

I happen to love many people.

It doesn’t matter if they reciprocate.

Love or hate me, it’s ok.

Life is a dance.

Yes, I dance, when I feel like it.

But when I don’t, buzz off.

We are born alone, get our wings, at some point, and fly.

No, I don’t need another person to fulfill me.

However, yes, as long as I am alive, I will continue to pursue the friendship of those I encounter.

Life and love: Entwined.

And when it is all said and done?

Cherish your relationships.

Tell those you love, every chance you get, that you love them, before it is too late.


Job searching?

Not sure if I had a plan this morning or not.

Let’s face it: 530am?

Why am I up at this hour?

Oh yeah!

It’s Tuesday, trash pickup day.

If there is one thing that I miss about a husband, it is trash pickup day.

A sad reality.

As for anything else?

Well, let’s just say, I loaded up the trash and trashed it by myself.

I know that it won’t be picked up until 2pm, but I like to appear to be organized.

When, in reality, I am one hell of a mess.

My reward?

Breakfast, of course: Coffee, eggs, corned beef hash and toast, at the friendliest place in PA: The Quality Shop.

A wild desire for watermelon led me to the grocery store.

I ate the melon in the car, on the way home.

Time to hang out with P Daddy… until the princess Dana left work.

She had been on vacation, and I could not wait to hear about it.

Much to my surprise, the village idiot was at the bar, drinking beer.

He needed a hug.

Said he was job searching.



“Today, he said. I have a resume somewhere on my computer. Can I drag it?”

Can someone please take me out back and shoot me?

Dana walked in and tried to help him.

Kim had tried all day, but ….. well, what can I say?

In walks Sam, the caregiver, who gave up on the computer advice and fed him.

Let me just say this about that: ” Just shoot me…. now.”

One by one, the patrons got the heck out: ” Niagra Falls!’ Slowly he turned, step by step, inch by inch….”

And then, I was on my way home.

Amazing cloud formations in the sky, bringing me back to reality.

P Daddy? Still alive.

Me? same.


Who knows?

Life is unpredictable.

Except, of course, for trash pickup day and village idiots.


A lifetime in a nutshell

Out of the blue today: Is life real? or an illusion?

I vaguely remember growing up, going to school, getting a job, playing oboe, graduating.

Then there was that accident the night after graduation, with my 2 friends, Susie and Marilyn.

Somehow we escaped without any consequences.

After that? College, still working, woodwind quintets and getting engaged to be married.


I didn’t want to get married.

But I did.

Not a great idea.

14 years later, I was a career woman, taking care of a sick husband, and living in Nebraska, until the marriage dissolved.

A chance meeting with, the “love of my life”.

Oh yeah?

5 years later, my career was really my “love.”

Moved East.

He moved West.

Met crazy Jim.

Another wild marriage.

30 years later, a widow.

What’s it like to be free after all those years?

Unbelievably good.

Just doing what I like, each day.

My friends: “Hey, what are you doing tomorrow?”

Don’t ask.

I really don’t know, until I wake up and figure it out.

Free falling, that’s me.

Nothing can compare to living for the moment.

Spontaneity: It is the ultimate high.

Yes, I had wonderful moments in the past.

And many not so wonderful days.

Looking back, I made it through the best and the worst times of my life.

I don’t know if all of that was real or I have been illusionary.

The past is gone forever.


Just a dream.

But today: it was spectacular, because I could kick back, enjoy my friends, act a little crazy and just be me.

Life: Reality? or an illusion?

Whichever, It is a hoot!


The messenger: a dove

The dove is back.

He was here when Harry, my brother in law died.

And when my husband died, there he was again.

Today, he is here to serve as a messenger, mourning the death of my brother in law, Jim.

I feel comforted by the dove’s presence, looking at me from the deck railing, a symbol of love and peace.

Memories flood my mind: Jim: a wonderful husband, father, grandfather, son, brother, veteran, fire fighter, and friend.

His service to our country, our community and to the family will serve as a lasting legacy.

My heart aches for my sister and family.

Jim leaves us with a hole in our hearts, but only temporarily.

Life does go on.

“End? No, the journey doesn’t end here. Death is just another path, one that we all must take. The grey rain-curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass, and then you see it.” J. J. R. Tolkien.

Rest in peace Jim.



2nd time at the bar today.

Started out shopping.


Dunkin for coffee.


Hungry as a bear.

Spectator’s was open at 11am.

Cobb salad please.


In walks Carl.

He doesn’t recognize me.

“Hey Carl, you goof… what the hell have you been up to?”

A few/several beers later, Carl left, just in time.

Mark came in.

Those 2 don’t get along.

So happy to avoid a confrontation.

Home at 330pm.


Would I like to join Sam at Spectator’s?

Why the hell not?

Walked in, to greet Meghan, who had been so attentive to me all day.

“I’m back!!!”

Meghan looks stunned.


Sam is eating a salad, and can’t stay long.

Neither can or should I.

However, a few more Coors, just because.

In walks Tim and his friend Phil.

Then Don.

You know what?

I think if I had stayed any longer, I would be there for at least a few more days.

A crazy day, with good friends.

Home again, at 6pm.

I am staying home for the night.


Birthday party at 3pm.


Who knows?

See you all at Hummel’s, for a prearranged meeting of the hottest seniors on the planet.

I think I should make a resolution to behave myself and to grow up.

On second thought….. Just kidding.



What a lovely ending to a waterless day

No water.

Called the plumber; told him it is probably the pump.

In the meantime, I decided to eliminate the cob webs from the basement.


It was a flopping disaster.

I need to purge the basement, once I get water.

Do you know how many times I turned on the faucet, and nothing but air?

When the plumber arrived, he was a jolly old elf.

His eyes how they twinkled, his dimples how merry.

He said to me: Carol? It was a minor adjustment: A switch went south.

Or something like that.

You have water.

Hey, Mr Elf: Thanks!

May I leave now, to have a few beers?

And I did.

What a great ending to a waterless day.

Back on track for tomorrow.

My usual debauchery.

Have a fabulous night everyone!!



Resizing or downsizing? Depends on your age.

Started out, thinking that it was time to donate Jim’s clothes.

Not an easy thing to do.

However, after 2 years?

What the heck am I waiting for?

A reincarnation?

Or just feeling slightly guilty?

If he hasn’t resurfaced in 2 years, well…..

And then my neighbor stopped by to pick up some of the items that Jim had accumulated.

It was a day to hang out at home, to reflect on the past, and to get on with the future.

On that note, I drove to Patti’s for a lovely dinner of fajitas and coors light, on the patio, on a spectacular summer’s night.

All the time, wondering what’s next.

With that thought in hand, I am ready to find a way to get rid of everything in this house.

I believe many of us have accumulated too much stuff.

Ok, if not you, I have.

Time to downsize, to re-evaluate what the hell I am gonna do in my ancient life, as I get must remind myself: Don’t give up until you drink from the silver cup and ride that highway in the sky.

Good night, peeps!!


The ongoing battle for control

A challenging day, to be sure.

Rather than give in to negative vibes, it was time to take out the trash, go to Dunkin for coffee and then, to lunch for chicken noodle soup and a grilled cheese sandwich.

There is no need to spill the beans on what the heck happened over night.

Yes, we had severe storms.

Yes, we had issues.

However, when life serves lemons, throw them out and have a few drinks.

The few drinks turned into an afternoon of several vodkas and club soda.

When the crowd came in they said: What are you drinking? Water?


With lemon.

A rip roaring time, with a “hell of a bartender” and other assorted friends.

My issues?

Who cares?

I will face them tomorrow.

After all, is there anything more important than being alive?

If you noticed, I said, “We.”

Yes, the cat and I share the same crazy experiences.

When she dies, or I die, or we both die, bury us in the back yard.

We deserve each other.

2 crazies living in a fishbowl, both of us trying to control one another.


She won.

As Scarlett O’Hara once said: After all, tomorrow is another day.

Frankly my dear, Puff Daddy, I don’t give a damn.

Secretly, I know she will win again.

Cats rule.



The cow came home

I can’t believe I am saying this: It was too hot to blog.

My routine was upended, squashed, and melted.

I took refuge in a few cool and comforting coor’s.

As the day languished on, and some of my favorite peeps showed up, I forgot all about the heat.

“I’m staying here til the cows come home,” I said.

And yes, this idiot cow, finally left the establishment, cool as a cucumber.

That lasted about 2 minutes.

The blast furnace was roaring.

The heat was relentless, oppressive and obnoxious.


As they say in Jersey: “forghedaboudit

I just can’t leave without asking this original, creative question: Is it hot enough for you?


Embrace diversity: it is our future

There are times when one least expects to find the truth, that it materializes.

Differences and prejudices: Of course they exist.

For me?

I am not going to criticize my Hispanic sisters and brothers, if they cannot speak English.

I refuse to condemn alternative life styles.

My ancestors came from Ireland and Norway, seeking a better life, not for their immediate gratification, but for their children and grandchildren.

My religion?

Roman Catholic.

To be Catholic and Irish was not accepted by the main stream.

Somehow, we survived and prospered.

We were not wealthy, but we had a loving family life, surrounded by those who were like us, and those who were not.

I learned early on, that diversity is the key to success.

Together, we supported the concept that differences made our country richer.

Today, I am proud to say that I still feel that way, in spite of our current leadership.

Language and ethnicity do not define us.

We believe that everyone has the right to pursue their dreams, their happiness and their destiny.

Together we are richer, better and stronger.

Cheers to those who believe that all of us matter; that regardless of our beliefs and backgrounds, we have one thing in common: The decency and respect of our universal family.