The new guy at the home showed up at breakfast wearing a suit and tie. He made his way to every table, shaking our hands, and introducing himself as Willie. We were cordial and welcomed him and made a few remarks about being overdressed. Willie just smiled and said, “I like to look nice. I believe that a good day starts out with looking good.”
Willie asked the group if he could say grace. He stood in the front of the room and asked us to bow our heads. When he finished, we thought he would sit down, but no such luck. Willie wanted us to recite the Pledge of Allegiance. We all stood up and faced the flag, and did as he said. Then he asked for one more thing: Could we please sing the Star Spangled Banner? Before we could answer, Willie was at the piano, singing and playing, and we all joined in.
By this time, our eggs were getting cold, so we sat down to eat. Well, forget it. Not with Willie around. He brought out a bag of labels, and asked us to pass them around. Could we please write our name on the label and wear them, so he could get to know us better? We cooperated and attached our labels, and asked Willie if he thought we should eat, before our breakfast got cold.
Never ask Willie anything. He grabbed a microphone and started a tirade about the starving people in some foreign place. He had a slide projector and started showing us pictures of emaciated kids. He rattled on about the selfishness of the world, and how we had it in our power to change these conditions.
Betty spoke up and called Willie a showboat. Frank told him he was a candy ass, and a dandy. And Norma, well, she called him a nincompoop. George told Willie to sit down and shut up, and that the good people of this home were having breakfast, and that he was not going to ruin it for us. After all, Seniors love their food.
We never did see Willie again. We heard that he had been kicked out of several other homes, for being a nuisance and a blabber mouth. Once in awhile, someone will mention the Willie incident, and we all laugh.
The lesson to be learned: When you come into someone’s home, you should respect those that live there, and who enjoy their daily routine. And never trust anyone who wears a suit to breakfast.