“Well, Minnie, now that I will soon be another year older, I am turning over a new leaf. I am making changes to my life.”
“It’s about time.”
“Yes, I will no longer drink white wine.”
“Oh for stupid. You don’t even like white wine.”
“I will be a nicer person.”
“Thank God!”
“Shut up, you idiot.”
“So much for that.”
“I will not communicate with those who are grouchy, deranged or drunk.”
“Hmmm. That means you will have no one to talk to at work.”
“I will modify my diet, to include more greens.”
“Hooray! Salads!”
“No, green M & Ms and more limes in my margaritas.”
“You are not changing, you are getting worse.”
“I will not buy a dozen bottles of wine every week.”
“Good.”
“I will buy those big fat bottles instead, and only buy 6.”
“Ridiculous. That’s what you are.”
“I will not complain.”
“Right, Wolf, sure you won’t.”
“That’s what I dislike about you Minnie. You are always putting me down. I really hate it when people….”
“Next.”
“I will make all my co-workers happier.”
“No kidding? When are you retiring?”
“And finally, I will quit playing hard to get.”
“Oh brother. Why don’t you add one more?”
“What?”
“You will quit trying to be funny. We’re all wise to your antics.”
“Ok. I will quit trying to be funny. I will be hilarious.”
Wolf