The residents of the Autumn Years Rest Home were eating breakfast. Wolf entered the dining room, with a plastic bag in her hand, along with a box of tissues and a bottle.
“What’s up Wolf?”
“Shut the hell up, Minnie. I have been sick. Stay away from me, all of you. I have a very bad cold.”
“What’s in the bottle? Wine?”
“Cough syrup, you morons. I am sick.”
“Get real, Wolf. We have had colds before. Quit complaining.”
“Not like this one. I am really sick.”
“Hey Wolf, don’t breathe on us. You are a walking disease.”
“I am only here to get some nourishment. So don’t sit by me. Don’t approach me. Don’t even talk to me. I am miserable.”
The Director of the Home entered the dining room. She had an announcement:
“Excuse me everyone. There is a very dangerous virus going around. I implore you to keep your hands clean and do not rub your eyes, nose or mouth.”
Minnie spoke up: “Gordon picks his nose. Frank rubs his eyes. And Wolf is always mouthing off. I think we should ban those three from the dining room.”
“No Minnie. No. This is not about placing blame. But I will say that Wolf ought to be confined to her room. She is looking very poorly.”
Wolf spoke up, in between blowing her nose and coughing. “Hey. I got this cold from hanging out with you retards. I resent those allegations. Am I welcome or not? If not, I refuse to pay my monthly rent. This is an abomination.”
Miss Ratcher said, “No Wolf. We are not blaming you. But you are a mess. Can we bring your meals to your room?”
“No. I refuse to eat in my room. So there. Either accept me and my disease, which I caught from someone in here, or comp my room.”
A table was set up in the back of the room, for Wolf and any others who were diseased. Wolf reluctantly sat at the table and was quickly joined by Gordon and Frank. Gordon was picking and Frank was rubbing.
And Wolf? She blew into her tissues and mouthed, “I won the lottery last night.”
The residents paraded up to the diseased table. “Wow Wolf. Congratulations! Can you loan me ….”
Wolf let out a raucous hoot. She had won 5 dollars. And she sneezed into the madding crowd.