How can a day be so beautiful while the deadly virus continues to grow?
An absolutely picture perfect day, with sunshine, blue skies, and a light breeze. A great day to relax with a book on the deck, knowing full well that I had a list of things to do that would not get done, at least not today.
It is the best of times and the worst of times, with the same question day after day: How long will this last?
I feel I am retreating again, into myself; that same old behavior that has been problematic in the past for me. I just want to be alone, to rest and to think, hoping that these feelings will pass, before I give in to the dark side of my personality.
I remember feeling this way when the Gulf War started in 1990. And when New York suffered the terrorist attacks on 911. And again, in 1983, when my father and my husband died. I had no control over any of these events, just as I have no control over Covid.
When I attempt to intellectualize what the problem is, my thoughts lead me to believe that I am grieving, for the losses in my life. My heart goes in another direction and throws me into a state of depression.
Grief is real. I can’t ignore it. I will live through the process, once again, taking my time to finally accept reality, like it or not.
To live fully, we must be willing to embrace sadness as well as happiness. For every thing there is a season.
Stay safe today.
Love and peace,
Wolf
Escape
Are you usually a positive person? Or negative?
Do you give up easily, or continue to pursue your goals, in spite of difficulties?
Do you encourage others to succeed?
Do you follow your heart or your head?
In times like this, do you follow safety measures? or just give up and go for it?
If you need a break from the morbid news of the day, what do you do to escape? Or do you escape?
A challenging time, for sure. The experts are predicting we may not see an end to the virus in months, maybe years. And the vaccine? Who really knows?
Meanwhile, the number of cases and victims continue to rise dramatically.
Not sure if you needed to get away from all this or not, but I did. My choice of escape? Sleep. But now I am awake and guess what? Nothing has changed. I am not myself. I am feeling hopeless, sad and empty, not just for me, but for all those who are suffering around the globe.
Scientists say wear masks, wash your hands and practice distancing. I hear what you are saying, but have doubts if that is really what we need to control and isolate the virus. It is working, they say, in other countries, but not ours. We blew it, hanging out in bars, beaches and other crowded places. We threw caution to the wind, and now we are in for the long haul.
And all this happened as most of us entered the green zone, easing restrictions. A glimmer of hope, looking more like a death sentence for millions.
Yes, I am depressed. My next move: Grab a book and immerse myself in another time, another place. The virus may be in control of where I can go, and how I can act in public, but it cannot control my mind. There. I feel better already.
Wishing everyone peace and hope!
Wolf
Escape
What’s waiting for us now?
A frantic appeal from Tina, who was having a bad day: Are you going to Specs tonight?
Tonight, after all, is the last night that Specs will be open, on the patio for 10 days. The family is going on a much needed vacation.
Of course, my dear, Tina. See you later.
Little did I know that our favorite cutie, Kait, would join us, along with Meg, Mark and Davey, aka Elvis.
The patio was leaping and hopping on a moon shadow, with people waiting for a table to open.
Meg had to leave: Work is calling. Mark left. He rarely stays more than 5 minutes, and the rest of us? Well, we had a crazy, wonderful time.
When twilight approached, it was time to wish all the customers a wonderful night, and to finally get the heck home.
I could not tell you who the customers were, but they all seemed to know either me or Davey.
I am not sure when we will meet again, as we all know the virus is spreading, but when we do, nothing will have changed among us. We always pick up from where we were, the last time we met.
Good friends are awesome.
All our troubles seem to melt away, when we get together.
I chose to have a happy day!
Did you?
Wolf
The simple life
A perfect day in the life of the craziest woman I know: Yes, me.
Sunny, warm, not too muggy.
Cool breeze from time to time.
Blue skies, fluffy white clouds.
No schedule, no deadlines.
A new book, “Where the crawdads sing.”
Homemade raisin bread and peanut butter cookies.
Grabbed a chair and sat on the deck.
Could not resist looking at those fluffy clouds, using my imagination: My little doggie, Barkley! I see him! Then he drifted away to rainbow ridge.
Getting a big dose of vitamin D without any pills.
So quiet, except for the tiny bird who wanted to fly into his bird house, but hesitated when he saw me.
Freshly cut lawn: the yard and trees looked spectacular, green and lush.
Feeling perfectly content, to live in such a beautiful world.
I believe I have changed since the pandemic. I no longer take my health, my friends, nor my life for granted.
I am enjoying every possible moment of every day.
I hope you are, too.
Wolf
I hear voices
Self talk:
Not again?
Yes, I overdid it last night.
What is wrong with you (me)?
Well, I was enjoying life in the moment, and when Ray said, “One more beer?”, my voice said yes, against my better judgment.
What were you doing all day?
Playing games, eating pancakes, laughing with the girls, and then, suddenly it was 8pm.
Suddenly, huh?
Yup. Just like that. In a blink of an eye, time few by.
So, it had nothing to do with the amount of slushies and beer you consumed?
It might have, because I am not exactly peppy this morning.
You are the walking dead. Or at least half dead.
Maybe I just need to get some fresh air.
Here she goes again.
No, today I am putting on my resting bitch face, and becoming a hermit.
Sure you are.
I am turning over a new leaf.
Liar.
Ok, so what’s it to you?
I am you, you idiot.
Look, I can’t help it. The world was moving, she was right there with it, and she was.
Incorrigible.
You got it. And guess what? I am not changing. I like being an incorrigible idiot.
And that you are.
End of self talk.
Wolf
guilty as charged
The cat’s in the cradle and the silver spoon. Little boy blue and the man in the moon. When you coming home, Dad? I don’t know when, but we’ll get together then, son, you know we’ll have a good time then.
Father’s Day: To those who are still with us and those who have passed on, you will forever be in our hearts and minds.
After a fierce rain storm on Friday, yesterday was a welcome change: sunny, warm, breezy and comfortable. Sissy and I played music trivia and then password, outside, until we reached the point of total silliness. Have you ever laughed so hard that you felt like your smile and your ribs were broken or at least frozen? The crazy laughter spread through the quiet neighborhood like a rabid hyena. What a crazy time.
Today is clam day. Specs is serving clams. As Tom Petty would say: There’s something good, waitin down this road. I’m picking up whatever is mine.
I watched the Tulsa OK rally last night. No violence. Thank goodness. But across the nation, more shootings in major cities. My question is why? Have we forgotten how precious and fragile life is? Yes, we need change, but killing others? Is this nation out of control? Of course we are. We are taking sides against one another. Free speech allows us to speak our own minds, and it is healthy to address disagreements and differences. Shooting, hurting or killing others is not ok. Some of my facebook friends tell me if I disagree with them, they will “unfriend” me. So be it. If disagreeing is wrong, then I am guilty as charged. But I refuse to lose friendships over it.
On my way to devour selenium, manganese, vitamin C, B 12, copper, phosphorus, and riboflavin. In other words, clams.
Wishing you all happiness, peace and a healthy Father’s day!!
Wolf
It’s raining fire balls
Decided to hang with the regulars: Out door dining for lunch and a few blasts.
Oh my! Are you kidding? We are going off the rails on a crazy train.
Yes, it rained.
And rained.
And rained.
Soaked to the bone.
You had to be there to experience the unbelievable downpours that lasted over 2 hours.
Hey! Bobby! You are wet.
Hey Tim! You are soaked.
Hey Sam! You are a mess.
Hey Carol! What the heck? And what’s with the coughing? Please, somebody, take this wet head coughing idiot out back and shoot her.
As the rain eased up, we celebrated with fireball shots.
And then?
Let’s continue on this path of debauchery, and have a few more fire balls.
Enters Dana, who takes control of the situation.
I wonder what it is like to be Dana?
Remember David Bowie? I stumble into town, just like a sacred cow..
Well, this cow stumbled home, to get the heck out of my wet clothes.
Did I enjoy it?
Yes!
The rain was relentless and the friendships solidified, the wetter we got.
What a day!
What an experience!
We were so miserable, that all we could do was laugh and drink fire balls.
Here’s to the rain, friendship and fireballs!
It was an amazingly fun day!
Wolf
A mixed bag
The last few days have been a mixture of many kinds.
Rain, then sun, then heating up with humidity.
Luncheon : On, then off, then meet for drinks.
Kim: Spreading great news, then she drives home and pops her weasel on I 78.
Bryan: Long hair hippy, happy as a clam working with his son.
Me: Staying away from the boys in the hood, trying out new dives to find one to call my new home. On the way, ordered a white pizza with tomatoes. I love white pizza. oink oink.
Mrs Butterworth, Aunt Jemima and Uncle Ben: Here today, gone tomorrow. I will miss Mrs. B’s bottle. I love that bottle.
News? Supreme court : 2 decisions. I like both of them.
Covid: Spreading its thorny balls in many states. Others? Not so much. Pennsylvania is coming out of the mist. Is it really because of the masks?
Airline travel: 3 stops. From Pa to Mn, Multiple airlines. 9 hours to get there. WTH? It’s no wonder I procrastinate.
Sleep? Badly needed, but tossed and turned. Took 2 pms after watching at least a dozen forensic file programs. Slept until 9am. Nightmares galore.
My favorite Governor: One more webcast. I will miss listening to Puff Daddy, now that NY is successfully opening up again. Congratulations to him and his staff. He faithfully held his webcast every day, for over 100 days, to communicate with his constituents. That, to me, is leadership.
I hope you chose to be happy today.
Much love!
Wolf
Wild horses
Whoa Nelly!! The horses got loose again yesterday. Let the winds of change fluff up our wings and let us fly. Luncheon and an unexpected birthday party for Ron, whoever he is. He was with his wife and they don’t drink. Leave it to the girls to get him to drink a birthday martini.
We probably should have stopped after toasting to his 67th birthday, but being who and what we are, no chance. Our server, Bridget, such a sweetheart, was back to work after 3 months. Of course, we had to celebrate her return, after the birthday boy left.
Today, all wild party animals are home, some in the dog house. Will we ever learn?
My dog and cat sitting job was cancelled after vacation plans went up in covid flames. You know what that means? I will be left to my own supervision again. If only that damn virus would die and the travel industry came alive again, I would take a break from my obnoxious life style and hang out at the North Pole, aka Minnesota, for awhile.
More states are experiencing high surges of Covid, which is disconcerting. It may be that we are in for the long haul, and will not see the light at the end of the tunnel until next year. GRrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
Oh, I saw a bear today, near Old 22. A pretty big bear, at that. I think it was a bear. It was furry and big and looked hungry. I wanted to share a bagel with him, but by the time I got back from Dunkin, he was gone. So I ate it. Not the bear, the bagel.
Choose to be happy today!!
Love to all!
Wolf
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